09/07/2025
Hayzz
argones
(Long post ahead!)
âSana Hindi Nâyo Na Lang Ako Pinanganakâ: A Hard Truth From a UP Graduate That Future Parents Should Hear
âIf bringing a child into this world means subjecting them to similar or potentially worse hardships than I endured, itâs better to reconsider having a child at all.â
Graduation season is typically a time when social media is filled with heartfelt tributes from students expressing gratitude to their parents. But for 22-year-old Jaynard Tiangco Ronquillo of Lubao, Pampanga, his message took a different routeâone that stirred national reflection.
A recent graduate of the University of the Philippines Los BaĂąos with a degree in Chemical Engineering, Jaynard began his viral graduation post with a line no parent ever wants to hear: âSana hindi nâyo na lang ako pinanganak.â His raw and honest post, which he permitted Smart Parenting to share, has since garnered over 99,000 reactions and 39,000 shares. âI just wanted to show the other side of the story,â he said.
Jaynard admitted that discussions with his friends about generational trauma influenced his decision to open up publicly. He hoped his words could spark a much-needed conversation around responsible parenthood and the struggles children born into poverty often face.
â˘Growing Up With Less, Yet Trying to Dream Big
In his post, Jaynard painted a clear picture of his upbringingâbeing the eldest in a household that had no college graduates, raised by hardworking parents doing everything they could to survive. His father worked multiple jobs as a tricycle driver, mechanic, and driver-for-hire, while his mother juggled roles as a housekeeper, seamstress, health worker, and dishwasher in a catering business.
Despite their financial hardships, Jaynard was an exceptional student, often topping his classes and joining academic competitions. He described himself as âthe hopeful childâ who believed education would lift their family out of poverty. But reality hit hard.
âWhy do they have things we donât?â he recalled asking himself as a child. âWhy could my classmates afford full meals while my brother and I had to share one egg between us?â He even joked about how he would give his brother a side-eye if he took the larger yolk portion.
He added, âAt a young age, I learned that life was unfair. Some kids like me were forced to ignore their hunger and focus on school, because we simply didnât have a choice.â
â˘The First Time He Said It
One of his earliest memories of deep frustration happened when he was just 11 years old. During a local fiesta, he wanted to try a ride with his friends but had no money. He asked his mom, already exhausted from working as a house helper, if she could spare anything. She told him, with rapid-fire explanation, that what little they had left was for food.
Overcome by disappointment, he threw a tantrum, and his mother disciplined him. In the heat of the moment, he blurted out, âSana hindi nâyo na lang ako pinanganak.â That was the first time he uttered those wordsâbut not the last.
â˘The Second Time: As a College Scholar, Still Struggling
Years later, while studying at UP and benefiting from scholarships, Jaynard found himself in a similar emotional pit. Although he was receiving stipends, they were all going toward his familyâs debts and basic expenses. He still couldnât make ends meet.
During one particularly tough time, with bills piling up and no financial help available, he reached out to his mother again. She had nothing to give. Thatâs when, out of exhaustion and despair, he repeated those painful words: âSana hindi nâyo na lang ako pinanganak.â
He clarified that his intention was not to blame his parents but to express the emotional toll of growing up under such conditions. âI love my parents deeply,â he said. âBut sometimes, I wonder how different their lives could have been if they had the chance to chase their own dreamsâif poverty hadnât held them back, or if they didnât have to raise a child amid it.â
â˘What If Things Had Been Different?
Jaynard reflected on the possibilities that might have unfolded if his parents had the freedom to live for themselves first. âWhat if my father, who is so skilled with his hands, had studied engineering? What if my mother, who was top of her class, went to college and became a professional?â
He imagines an alternate life where his parents pursued passion over survival. âMaybe in that world, I wouldnât have been bornâbut maybe that wouldâve been better for them.â
He emphasized that this wasnât about regret but about encouraging future parents to think critically before starting a family. âDONâT LET YOUR CHILD BE LIKE ME,â he wrote in all capsâhis plea to adults to be emotionally, mentally, and financially prepared before bringing life into the world.
â˘A Message to Future Parents: Think Before You Create Life
âParenthood isnât just about loveâitâs about readiness,â Jaynard said. âIt may come off as cruel, but the truth is, if having a child means exposing them to the sameâor worseâpain and deprivation that I endured, it might be best to wait, or rethink the choice altogether.â
He believes that parents must consider not just whether they can have a child, but whether they are equipped to nurture, support, and raise one in a healthy environment.
âThe future of your child depends on the foundation you give them,â he said plainly.
â˘A Glimpse of Hope and a Motherâs Love
Despite everything, Jaynard still holds onto hope. He dreams of a time when no child has to carry the burden of poverty or question why they were born. âI know it sounds impossible, even like reaching for the starsâbut I hope someday, no child will ever have to say, âSana hindi nâyo na lang ako pinanganak.ââ
His mother, Jennifer, also responded publicly. She expressed nothing but love and pride for her son:
âI may not have been able to give you the comforts others enjoy, but Iâve never regretted having you. Your father and I love you so much. You are a blessing to us.â
â˘To Students Who Relate: You Are Not Alone
Jaynard, now preparing for his board exams and seeking employment, left a message for students who, like him, have grown up fighting silent battles.
âYour feelings are valid,â he said. âIf I could hug everyone going through what I did, I would. Living in poverty is no joke. But letâs not lose hopeâwe can get through this.â
